The Importance of Naming your Core Values

Core values act as a compass, guiding us through life’s complexities and providing clarity during tough decisions or moral dilemmas. They are the silent builders of a purposeful and fulfilling life. But to truly benefit, core values must be more than abstract concepts—they need to be integrated into our daily lives as guiding principles that shape our choices.

For much of my life, I believed I had a clear internal compass and that my core values acted as my north star. Though I never wrote them down—or even made a mental list—I assumed they were there, ready to surface when needed. I floated through life with the vague confidence that, when the moment came, my values would reveal themselves. I knew my family came first and that respect mattered deeply to me. Yet I often felt an underlying discomfort, as though something in my life wasn’t quite aligned. Without defined values, I found it difficult to articulate that unease. Looking back, I was lacking a standard against which to measure the quality of my decisions.

It wasn’t until a major turning point forced me to question myself that I realized how far I’d drifted from the woman—and the mother—I aspired to be. How did this happen? For me, the lack of clarity around my core values left them blurry and inaccessible, robbing me of the guidance I needed to live in alignment with my true self. 

Exploring our core values is a journey of self-awareness and personal growth. It encourages us to reflect on what truly matters, helping us align our actions with our beliefs. While core values often operate beneath our conscious awareness, they quietly guide our decisions, particularly during moral dilemmas or significant life choices.

The benefits of identifying and embracing your core values are profound: improved self-awareness, better decision-making, more satisfying relationships, and ultimately, a deeper sense of purpose. When clearly defined, core values guide us to live authentically, pursue our passions, and positively impact the world around us.

The Challenge of Identifying Core Values

When I first tried to identify my core values, I felt completely lost. Should I make a list? What if I forgot something important? And how could I determine which values were most crucial for living authentically? It became clear that this process required deep introspection and reflection.

Fortunately, when the time was right, I discovered a website offering exactly the tool I needed—and generously made free of charge. At www.personalvalu.es, I was presented with a comprehensive list of characteristics and aspirations to identify my top five values. The first step involved selecting all the traits that resonated with me on some level. Then, through a series of comparisons, I was asked to choose between two values at a time—for instance, growth versus inner harmony. In such cases, I might decide that inner harmony enables growth and select it. When faced with financial security versus material success, I had to confront the nuances of my priorities. This iterative process required me to weigh dozens of value pairs until my top five values emerged. While additional insights were available for a fee, I found the free assessment enlightening and now make a point of revisiting the tool annually to track how my values evolve alongside my self-awareness.

Identifying core values isn’t a one-time task; it’s an ongoing process. As we grow and evolve, our values may shift, reflecting our changing priorities and life circumstances.

Core Values as Decision-Making Tools

Our core values act as a compass, helping us navigate difficult decisions. By evaluating options against our values, we make choices that align with our beliefs. Research in psychology even shows that individuals with clear values tend to make better decisions and experience greater confidence in their choices.

For me, this confidence was elusive at first. I struggled with self-trust as I worked on increasing sensitivity to my intuition and sought a framework against which to measure my actions. Defining my core values became part of the foundation for building that trust and aligning my life with my authentic self.

I vividly remember the delight I felt upon discovering that curiosity ranked among my top five values. While I had always considered education important and thought of myself as a lifelong learner, identifying myself as inherently curious felt like a profound upgrade. This subtle shift in perspective transformed how I viewed myself. Suddenly, I began noticing the countless ways my natural curiosity expressed itself in daily life, and I took pride in this trait. Where I once might have dismissed some of my interests as mere distractions, I now recognized them as meaningful expressions of my curious nature. When it came to allocating financial resources to enhance my coaching skills and explore new modalities, I moved forward with confidence. The word “curiosity” had elevated my natural inclinations, allowing me to embrace them with conviction and purpose.

Once you’ve defined your core values and allowed them to nudge you toward good choices, the next step is integrating them into your daily life. When faced with a dilemma, pause to reflect: How does each option align with your values? What path resonates most with your beliefs? This conscious alignment can transform how you approach personal relationships, career decisions, and ethical challenges.

For instance, I often felt guilty prioritizing self-care over spending time with my children. Recognizing my values helped me understand that prioritizing my well-being ultimately allowed me to show up better for my family.

The Dynamic Nature of Values

Core values are not static; they evolve as we experience life. Major milestones—such as becoming a parent, experiencing loss, or changing careers—can profoundly reshape our priorities. External influences, like societal shifts or exposure to new perspectives, often prompt a reevaluation of values.

When I lost my father, I was confronted with questions about my own mortality and the meaning of life, which led me to prioritize activities that made me feel truly alive. Later, when my last child left home, I revisited my values and noticed significant shifts in prioritization. While family remained important, it no longer dominated my daily focus, allowing me to prioritize personal growth and learning. This evolution underscored how values act as a mirror of our current life phase, guiding us toward what matters most.

Menopause also played a pivotal role, pushing me to reevaluate my complacency around health. It became non-negotiable to keep health among my top five core values. Similarly, after my marriage ended, identifying my values informed my emerging identity, providing guidance on how to show up as my best self in various situations. This clarity became a powerful antidote to cognitive dissonance—the inner tension caused by conflicting values—which often leads us to rationalize behaviours rather than align actions with our beliefs.

Understanding my values also helped me define where I ended and others began, transforming both my relationships and my self-respect. Previously, my fear of rejection and tendency to people-please left me feeling ungrounded and resentful, with no clear path to release those emotions. The concept of setting boundaries once felt abstract and unattainable. However, as I clarified my core values, the process of creating boundaries fell naturally into place, offering me a renewed sense of agency and balance.

Living Your Values Daily

Embracing and living by your core values allows you to stay true to your authentic self. When actions align with beliefs, you experience integrity and fulfilment. It’s not enough to identify your values; the real power lies in embodying them consistently.

In relationships, shared values deepen connections and foster trust. We’ve all heard the advice to assess shared values before committing to a life partner, as these commonalities create a solid foundation for building a future together. However, the importance of shared values extends beyond romantic relationships. Even in friendships, our core values can guide us in deciding where to invest our energy. For instance, if I receive invitations from two friends—one who dismisses my curiosity as peculiar and another who finds it charming—which friend am I more likely to gravitate toward? Our values often quietly influence these choices, shaping the quality of our relationships.

In leadership, values-based decision-making fosters ethical cultures that inspire trust and respect. For example, a business that prioritizes and supports continued education will naturally attract curious employees. Similarly, an individual who values equality is unlikely to feel aligned with a company that neglects diversity in its workforce. Whether in personal or professional contexts, living by your core values is not a one-time effort but an ongoing process of alignment, reflection, and growth.

Integrating core values into your life enriches your sense of purpose and authenticity. It inspires those around you and fosters deeper social bonds. By regularly revisiting and refining your values, you stay adaptable and aligned with your evolving self.

Living your values is not an endpoint but a lifelong journey. It’s about consistent actions, mindful choices, and recognizing the profound impact they have on your life’s trajectory. Start by naming your values and let them guide you toward a life of greater authenticity and fulfilment.

Conclusion

In the intricate fabric of human existence, core values stand as beacons of purpose and authenticity. They are not merely abstract ideals but guiding principles that illuminate our path through life.

Core values are the keys to unlocking a life of meaning and fulfilment. They empower us to navigate life’s complexities with authenticity and integrity. By embracing our core values, we embark on a journey that resonates with our true selves, enriches our relationships, and leaves a lasting legacy. Indeed, core values are the guiding light that leads us to a life well-lived. Your core values are not just guiding principles; they are the very essence of who you are, the foundation upon which you can build a life that is, in every sense, truly yours.

Check out the website: www.personalvalu.es and give a name to your top core values.

I want to invite you to envision the life you want to live, incorporating those core values. What does a life in alignment with your values look like? Create a vision board or a written statement that encapsulates this vision. Let it serve as a daily reminder of what truly matters to you.